Sometimes a thing just has to be done in less than ideal circumstances. And if it has to be done, just do it, and try to smile. The second you realize that you have choice, then the question is: "Who do I want to become?"
Your "self" isn't immutable. You aren't "a certain type of person". You are an evolving experiment. One that is certainly affected by the observer, and one whose outcome is affected by the inputs. If you want to carry something different in your heart, you can do that. You just have to want it bad enough that you can let go of the person you have been.
If you want to get good at something, you are going to need to first be ok being bad at it. If you can do that, then the next thing to do is figure out how you can put yourself in situation where you can safely make a whole bunch of mistakes in a short time. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable.
Your path is your path
And while it may be informed by the good and bad choices of all those who came before you, you (and you only) bear responsibility for your path.
And so own it, make peace with it, rip the band-aids off, look your weaknesses and shortcomings in the eye and just keep growing.
Here is the thing, and I don't mean for this to be a heavy burden, but... The Universe needs you to be striving. Striving to be a better: human, dad, mom, business person, neighbor, etc.
The only way to lead is by example, and that means being better. I want to live in a universe where you expect greatness from me, and I expect greatness from you.
Not as a contest among mortals, but as extreme ownership mutually shared among divine beings.